DIY Fortune Cookies

You have a new job: to write the messages in Fortune Cookies.

You will have a close encounter of the furry kind.
You will find true love where you least expect it.
Your mum will make you an offer you can’t refuse.
You will be forced to use bleach in the next 24 hours.
Your favourite jumper will become ruined by a red sock.
A distant relative will soon make themselves known.
An unexpected surprise awaits you.
If you’re reading this, you’ve lost the game.
Public humiliation will grow on you.
This is not just a fortune cookie, this is an m&s, shortbread infused, buttery fortune cookie.
Food poisoning will welcome you into tomorrow.
This message will self destruct in ten, nine, eight…

These are just some I’ve thought of, I’ll probably add to them eventually. Comment with any you can think of and I’ll put them on!